the silence closes its curtains and a little voice cries out..

these are the days when i feel i should draw myself away from people..

today is one of those days.. that i really really.. reaaally wish i had more cash.. so much so im willing to do anything for it.. it may be the root of all evil but it is also the blockade to my satisfaction..

i know what im missing..
though it does not affect me badly,
it's still so........ sigh~
i know what im missing..

i told my mom a part of me is depressed.

she asked why.
i couldn't answer.

she persisted and i said,
im depressed about what could've been. but it doesn't make sense because what is and what was can never be what could've been and that what could've been can never be known from what is and what was but merely speculated. so i guess being depressed about what could've been is but a composite of what is and what was.

i told my mom good nite.

went into my room.

the phone rang. talked. hang up.

i nearly cried.

im pathetic.

as much as i hate saying it..

in the end~

we still chose the life we're living..

sigh~

always remember andrew.. we chose the life we're living~

cheers dude

another year closer to true peace