i realized... whenever i feel down and depress...

i no longer have anyone i could talk to about it... it used to be you... but the situation has changed... your position has changed and therefore i can't tell you those things anymore...

i've lost my sister and my integrity... and on days like this... i feel that what i've gained is not what i truly want...

but yet... the clock cannot be reset... life cannot be turned back...

for things i have no control of, i shall endure... but for how long?

and if you ever read this... please don't ask me about it...

don't ask why...

just don't ask at all and let me put up my smile...